Me: i have 40 pts, my husband has zero, the cat is DSQ in the “Cleaning The Apartment” race
My sister: wow. how many pts do i have?
Me: you did not enter
Sister: did u not get my entry rag?
Me: you had to be in the apt to enter
Sister: weird. i was standin outside, but registration never opened…..
Me: you had to come inside. there was a table
Sister: oh god i completely missed the table!!!! were there free t-shirts “i cleaned 2011” and goodie bags (products from ur bathroom)
Me: there was free lip gloss from 2006
Me: you could say that. I think this is going to be my blog post from tonight. I’m really phoning it in.
Sister: yeah get on that blog. ive been studyin 4 physics all day
Me: yeah yeah. I have been reorganizing my kitchen cupboards also
Me: It’s not quite mom’s “grain storage” level, but there are a lot of grains. And my plastic containers fell out a few times.
Sister: how did u let this happen
Me: and there are some without lids
Sister: oh no
Me: and I know where this leads
so I nipped it in the bud
Sister: yeah ya do
Me: Mom will be so pleased: that these are the lessons we’ve learned from her
by her negative example.
Sister: did u compile the futze containers
Me: I spell it “futsy”
Me: Urban Dictionary lists “futsy” as meaning a “fart”
Sister: well thats not rite
Me: but a google search for “futze” turns up a few sites from Singapore that are not in English
Sister: i must say, effective use of ur time
Me: I should be cleaning out the coat closet, but I have lost the will to compete
Sister: maybe this is an opportunity for your husband to gain sum ground…..
Me: I think he’s accepted defeat
Sister: wow. mom’s thinking about writtin a xmas letter. i need to go over details of my life that are excluded for the press and general population & approve a photo she plan on using.
i wud hav my assistant do this….but i gave him sum time off
p.s. crosby is supposed to play 2morow! in other news i need to go shower
Me: she didn’t ask me about a photo, or a press release
Sister: well she hasnt dun anything yet
Me: and yes I heard that Super Crosby is back to Save Hockey!
Me: i just cleaned out the coat closet
Sister: i feel like we’ve exhausted all the Eminem jokes…..
Me: as far as I know, no mothers were harmed in the cleaning of my closet. except me, of course
Sister: boo whooo
Me: My husband has two hats. I have seven. I win.